At some point, conflict in a relationship or marriage is inevitable. The important question to ask is whether or not this is turning things towards a crisis. Waiting too long until things are damaged beyond repair is not in your best interests. If the two of you are really in trouble, it is extremely important to make a commitment to work on things in therapy together regardless of arguments, conflicts or other issues the two of you may have. Relationships and marriages are a commitment that both of you are in together. If things are not getting better despite your best efforts, it’s time to seek out professional therapy and counseling.
It hurts to discover that your relationship is in trouble. We think that if we hang on, we can “weather the storm”. Yet we feel alone, isolated, and afraid. Recovering from the issues that bring us to the brink by learning good communication skills is one of the primary goals of marital therapy. To do this, I use a modified version of Gottman Method Couples Therapy.
During the first session, I will meet with both of you to get a feel for your needs and how we might best tackle your issues. Often, I will have both of you take the Gottman Relationship Checkup test, which helps me to identify areas that you are already strong in and where our focus needs to be. We’ll go over the results and begin working on bringing the two of you closer by learning new skills and more positive ways of interacting with each other.
Patients interested in determining their level of relationship distress should take the Relationship Assessment Test as part of their treatment orientation.