I specialize in working with:
Anxiety, Stress & Worry
Worry is a pattern of thinking that is persistent, repetitive, and uncontrollable. When we worry, we often focus on the uncertainty of the future and are afraid that bad things will happen. We plan over and over in our head various solutions to our problems. Yet this in-depth thinking and ruminating never seems to provide any relief.
“I’m my own worst critic,” we might say in a sudden moment of insight. It is very true that most of us are hard on ourselves, particularly if we get even the slightest hint that we don’t measure up in some way – in our achievements, career or study, social standing, relationships, appearance, body image, financial status, and so on. If we make even the smallest mistake, then we have a tendency to berate ourselves, and if we make a genuine medium or large mistake, then look out!
Perfectionism involves putting pressure on ourselves to meet high standards which then powerfully influences the way we think about ourselves. Researchers have shown that parts of perfectionism are helpful, and parts are unhelpful. We’re here to help you identify and work on the unhelpful parts, so that you get satisfaction from your achievements and lead a more fulfilling life.
At some point, conflict in a relationship or marriage is inevitable. The important question to ask is whether or not this is turning things towards a crisis. Waiting too long until things are damaged beyond repair is not in your best interests. If the two of you are really in trouble, it is extremely important to make a commitment to work on things in therapy together regardless of arguments, conflicts or other issues the two of you may have. The Gottman Method can help couples understand why they are stuck and learn how to make healthy and permanent change.
Codependency is defined as being in a relationship where you do all the work and suffer all the consequences. Meanwhile, the other person does not grow or change, others don’t even notice all that you do, or appreciate it, and you end up worn out, exhausted, blamed, and torn apart. We learn how to be codependent from our childhood, our family of origin, and our life experiences. Learning a new way to become “unstuck” is critical to our survival as an intact and whole person, capable of relating to others in a responsible and mature manner.
Everyone, at some point or another, is uncertain about themselves, lacks self-confidence, doubts their abilities, or thinks negatively of themselves. However, if you think that you might have problems with low self-esteem, or are not sure if you have this problem but want to find out, then this is a sign that something might be impacting your quality of life.
Assertiveness & Boundaries
Assertiveness means being able to clearly and calmly express what you need without being overly passive (hurting your own self esteem) or aggressive (damaging other’s self esteem). Communicating assertively doesn’t guarantee you will have your needs met. However, it does make it more likely that you will be heard and listened to. It can also dramatically improve your relationships with other people in unexpected and beneficial ways.
Depression, Feeling Sad & Unmotivated
When we’re suffering from depression, we tend to think differently from other people. It’s as if we filter everything we see and experience through a negative light. Not surprisingly, this takes a big hit on our self-esteem and confidence. We start to feel discouraged and unmotivated as time goes on. Nothing feels the same as it once did. We wonder what’s wrong with ourselves, and we eventually end up believing that things will never, ever change. Even low-grade depression over a long period of time can be crippling.
Socially anxious people fear being evaluated negatively which is linked unhealthy beliefs about themselves and other people. They are anxious about appearing anxious in front of others. They tend to avoid certain interpersonal situations or endure them with a source of dread.
Panic usually starts out with a sudden surge of intense fear or discomfort. When these attacks become uncontrollable, they can start to interfere with our lives and trap us in a viscious and unending cycle. Learn different ways to cope with panic, explore the beliefs you have about these attacks and manage the symptoms along with it.
Obsessions are recurrent and persistent thoughts, urges, or images. They are often experienced as intrusive and unwanted, and cause anxiety or distress. We try to ignore or suppress these thoughts or images, but often with little success. Compulsions are repetitive rituals that are experienced as thoughts or actions, and are usually triggered by obsessions. We feel urgently driven to perform these rituals until we feel that it is “complete” in some manner.
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